The Letter
by ShadowShowSandra
Summary: Sandra receives a letter from Jack. If you haven't watched the season 4 finale & the season 9 premiere, I wouldn't bother reading this.
1. Chapter 1

Started June 1st, 2013

Note: Set a few months after the events of 9x01. Pretty massive spoiler!alert if you haven't seen that ep. I haven't read Tricks fic in about a year, so I hope this hasn't been already been done, but it's something that I needed to get out of my head.

_/_

Thursday afternoon found the UCOS team in their office, trying to make a dent in the paperwork for the case they were wrapping up. Sandra had taken the opportunity to go through the mail the young girl from the mailroom had dropped off earlier that morning. She sat perched on the edge of the sofa, flicking through the pile, throwing one envelope after another onto the coffee table, unopened. Brian and Gerry were at their desks supposedly typing up their reports, but Sandra wondered how much had actually been written when all she'd heard for the last hour was them yabbering on about football.

"Gerry Jr's got practice tonight you should come down, watch a star in the making."

Sandra waited to hear an excuse from Brian but he surprised her.

"You buying dinner?"

"If I must." Gerry whined, but she knew he was thrilled. "I'll cook us up something when we get home. Esther not back yet?"

_Esther, yes, gone away for the week to visit her sister._

Sandra smiled, throwing another envelope onto the coffee table. Poor Brian hated being in his house alone, he'd agree to just about anything not to go home. Gerry didn't care; any excuse to show off the pride and joy that was his grandson … and his cooking.

"Sandra?" She heard him ask.

_What …how did he know she was listening to them?_

"Football? Pass thanks."

"Dinner?" Gerry knew she rarely turned down an invite for food.

"If I must." She sighed, imitating his earlier comment. "Speaking of food, where the hell is Steve?"

Despite being the middle of January, the day had started off with clear, light blue sky and the sun, which hadn't been seen for days, was actually out. So Sandra had sent Steve down the street to pick up lunch at the new sushi bar.

That had been half an hour ago.

"Maybe he got lost?" Brian asked seriously.

Gerry scoffed.

Sandra was annoyed.

"It's like a minute walk up the road," she groaned, about to flick another envelope onto the table, but the scrawly handwriting looked familiar. She turned it over for a return address but there was none.

"Come over about 8 then?"

"What?" she asked now distracted.

"For dinner."

She nodded in acknowledgment, turning the envelope back over and checking the post mark. It had been sent from France a few days ago.

"Hey, look, a letter from Jack!"

She waved the envelope excitedly in the air, in Brian and Gerry's direction.

Gerry looked over at Brian confused, but he just shrugged his shoulders.

They both watched as Sandra turned back to the table and ripped open the envelope, pulling out a single paged letter. Like an overexcited child on Christmas morning, she was absolutely beaming.

Gerry covered his mouth with his hand, "Did you tell her?" he whispered, though he doubted Sandra was paying attention to their exchange anymore.

"Of course not…did you?"

Gerry just glared at him. Brian should know better, and he did, but that didn't stop him asking. There were many times when the three of them – Jack, Brian and Gerry - had discussed things only amongst themselves, as Jack and Sandra had, as Brian and Gerry still did. Brian wondered if Gerry and Sandra had private conversationsthat he wasn't privy to, _like he used to with Jack_.

Jack had been gone several months now, Sandra hadn't tried to contact him and she didn't think the others would either. She… _they_ all respected him far too much to disrespect his wishes, even if she especially, didn't understand them. Sandra didn't know what she expected to read, maybe something to help her make sense of all this, thrown in with a few vineyard references and all the glorious wine she was missing out on. As soon as she began reading Jack's words though, Brian and Gerry watched her smile disappear, replaced with her "concentration" face, the look she got when she was trying to fill a hole on the murder board.

After a very long minute, Gerry couldn't stand it any longer.

"Weeeeeeeeeeeell, what'd he say?"

"He um…I need to…"

Sandra got up, dropping the letter back down on the coffee table but it missed and floated to the floor as she walked out of the office, the door slamming behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

**WARNING:** Character death.

Brian and Gerry had barely exchanged stunned glances when the door to their office slammed again; they both looked over to see it was Steve.

"Where's Sandra gone off in a rush?"

"Dunno," Gerry got up from his desk and made his way over to the coffee table.

"Where's me lunch?" Brian asked, noticing Steve had returned empty-handed. He'd never had sushi before, but Sandra assured him he'd like it. And if he didn't, she'd let him bring the dog in for a day, since Esther was away.

Gerry retrieved Jack's letter off the floor and skimmed over it as Steve told Brian about how long the line up had been and how when Steve had gotten to the door, was told they had to close early because they'd sold out and their supplier wasn't making a delivery until tomorrow.

Gerry let out a heavy sigh.

"Ease up Gerry, I'll grab us something from upstairs, just came back for..."

"Nah, it's Jack," he shook his head, and flapped the letter. Brian grabbed it and took it back to his desk to read over.

"What about him?" Steve asked, genuinely concerned. Jack was a touchy subject around the office, especially with Brian. Steve liked the team and really wanted to stay around in London for a bit, he had tried hard not to rub any of them up the wrong way. He got along well with Sandra, and great with Gerry, Brian would take a bit of work, but that was understandable. He knew there was a lot of history with them all and Steve was the new kid in school. He still didn't have a desk. Jack's was kept immaculate, he assumed by Brian, in case Jack should return, and that was okay with Steve, who had agreed to stick around for as long as they needed him. Steve hadn't thought this very likely, but these guys had come out of retirement once before, didn't mean they couldn't again.

"Apparently he died…" Gerry trailed off.

"He what?" Steve asked, not sure he heard right.

Brian nodded his head slowly. He'd had time to prepare himself for this, but it was still a bit of a shock.

"Jack died," Brian repeated. "Instructed his nurse to send Sandra's letter after he… _Sandra_…" he said half aloud, half to himself.

_She had no idea._

The office was silent for a long, awkward moment. Gerry and Brian felt guilty. Steve was still trying to piece together details of office relationships and histories; he wasn't quite sure about what had gone on with Jack and Sandra

"If she's not back in…" Gerry began.

"Three," Brian and Steve chimed in unison.

"Three hours…" Gerry continued, and they all nodded.

"Forget lunch, let's call it a day, I'll buy you a round...?" Steve announced.

Brian and Gerry couldn't have left the office fast enough, as they all went across to the pub to have a drink for Jack.


	3. Chapter 3

Completed June 27th, 2013

**Author's note:** This chapter is long. I couldn't stop writing it and cutting things out and adding more and I didn't want to break it up into 2 pieces. Hope you all like it!

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Lunch, drinks and many stories about Jack where shared over the next few hours. It was just after 3pm when Gerry looked at his watch and decided it was time to go find Sandra and see if she was alright. He left Brian and Steve engrossed in a conversation about spooks and wasn't even sure if they realized he'd left. But Gerry was just glad to see them getting along, Brian had been very cautious about Steve joining their team; _replacing_ Jack.

It would be dark soon and the temperature had dropped considerably, the sun having long since disappeared behind a thick, low hanging blanket of grey. Gerry headed back over to their office to grab his coat, then went into Sandra's and grabbed hers. Her phone and car keys were still on the desk, so he knew there was no point calling her. Wherever she was, she had walked and since she wasn't an avid walker in her down time and wouldn't touch the Tube, Gerry doubted she had gone very far, like back home, so he ruled that out. He decided to head down to their _other _local pub on the river. Actually, they had about four or five "local" pubs, but two they frequented more often. Down on the river was where they usually went on a Friday night and random other occasions. That was where _he_ would be, sitting in the corner, in front of the fire, drowning in beer.

Cutting through the gardens, the air was ice cold against Gerry's face. He'd be smoking and walking if he could bear to take his hands out of his pockets, gloves weren't really his thing…and he was all out of fags. The embankment was practically deserted, save for a handful of people making their way elsewhere and a few unseasonable tourists who had stopped to take photos with fog-engulfed landmarks in the background. Even they weren't going to stick around and enjoy the view in the cold, Gerry watched as they finished up and moved back up along the river, in the direction he was about to go. But as they disappeared into the growing darkness and out of his line of sight, something else caught his eye, _blonde hair_, not hidden beneath a hat like everyone else he'd seen that afternoon pass by.

Sandra was sitting on a lone park bench up ahead, surrounded by bare trees, their branches overhanging like protective skeletons. Gerry took a deep breath and made his way over to the bench, watching her as she stared out at the river, unseeing, her cheek wet with tears she hadn't bothered to wipe away. He could count on one hand the number of times he'd seen her cry, and still have fingers left over. Sitting down beside her, he watched the fog dance off the water and wondered how he would tell her about Brian and Jack, or if he even should. He didn't know how long they sat silent for, two minutes, maybe thirty. He was so lost in the various scenarios playing out in his head that he didn't even hear her when she finally spoke, until she said his name again, in the tone she normally reserved for when she was annoyed with him; only this had far less effort behind it.

"How's Brian doing with this?"

"Oh yeah he's fine, don't worry about him," Gerry replied, probably a bit too enthusiastically, because Sandra turned her head towards him, to see if he was actually being serious. Gerry, however, paid little attention to her bemused expression.

"We're more concerned about how _you're _doing with this_."_

Sandra stared at him for a moment then turned her attention back towards the river and shook her head. They resumed sitting in silence again, and Gerry was left with all the thoughts in his head. He thought about the first time he had met Jack, when he and Sandra were interviewing for the U.C.O.S. positions nearly 10 years ago; some days felt like yesterday, and other days felt like his time as an actual "proper copper" was lifetime ago. Then Gerry thought about the time when they'd all gone to watch Jack "mediate" the dispute between the two families warring over their ice-cream companies, _poor Jack_ they had _tried_ to be supportive, he couldn't help but chuckle at the memory.

"What's so funny?" Sandra asked, interrupting his thoughts.

"Just thinking about that old case we had, with the ice cream vans."

"Jack the _mediator_…"

Gerry didn't need to see it to know she'd smiled at the recollection. He watched though, as it disappeared from her face, now it was her turn to get lost in thought. He wondered if she was thinking about that case, or another time she'd worked with Jack or even about Jack at all. But after a moment, she let him know.

"It's like losing my dad all over again, you know? Jack was always like my other dad … I think he did feel a bit guilty…responsible for me…"

Gerry thought so too even though Jack had denied it. She had been so angry at Jack, at all of them when she found out about her dad, that they'd all kept it from her. Gerry hadn't, he'd been truthful in his comment. He'd only ever heard Gordon mentioned once or twice back when he was a serving officer, his family might have known of him but Gerry had never met him let alone heard anything about his suicide. He was sure, had he been in Jack's position, he probably would have done the same thing. They'd all kept things from her though, usually because they didn't want to get her into trouble for their _unique_ investigative methods; sometimes, there were just things she was better off not knowing. This was different though, Gerry had to tell her about Brian or it would drive him crazy for the rest of his life. He mentally prepared himself for the potential shit storm he was about to unleash with her.

"Sandra, about Brian…" Gerry started his voice low and serious. Sandra shifted slightly on the bench, turning herself towards him, listening attentive.

She was really worried now, "he's not alright is he?"

Again, Gerry ignored her and continued, "Jack told Brian why he was going before he left, Brian confronted him about Elizabeth Green and Jack told him…"

"And you?" She stared at him intently and knew he'd known too.

"Esther was worried about Brian shutting down, couldn't deal with that by himself. She tried to get him to talk to her and he went to tell her, but couldn't. She thought maybe he would share it with me instead."

He waited for her to crack a shit and yell at him, she always did.

"He didn't want _me_ going there after him did he?" she asked with a sigh.

Gerry shook his head. "None of us … you know you would have…"

And he was right, she probably would have.

"You mind taking me home? she asked getting up from the bench and shaking her arms, "it's bloody cold out here."

"Yes ma'am," he saluted her.

As he stood, he caught her black coat, long forgotten half-draped over the edge of the bench and his leg.

"Here," he shook her coat out and held it up for her.

Sandra turned back around to face him, freeing her hair from under her collar. Then she reached into her pockets and pulled out her gloves, pausing before putting them on.

"Why'd you tell me all this?" she asked.

Gerry just shrugged his shoulders, "Brian didn't want to cop and earful from you, if he told you…"

She didn't doubt that was true, _poor Brian_, but she did doubt that was the only reason. She gave him a sad smile, and then caught him off guard, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug.

She rested her chin on his shoulder and let out a heavy sigh, "You're a good friend, Gerry."

He shook his hands free from his coat pockets and wrapped his arms around her.

"You, and Brian …" She trailed off, trying hard to fight back more tears.

Her boys.

Always looking out for her.

She'd be okay.

**Author's Note Addendum:** My first ever completed fic … ever… in 15+ years that I've been tossing around fic ideas on paper lol. I can retire now. Thank you all for your lovely comments, on here and off xx


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